Now miserable damned bastards are known to be such bastards by their behavior patterns, one of which is to scowl and huff and puff should one young boy give another young boy such a powerful orgasm that the young boy, after soaring through the galaxy and out into the nether reaches of space, finally wound up in Andromeda or far point, just depending on how really fucking good that orgasm was. You see miserable damned bastards are pointlessly and senselessly cruel fuckers, and so therefore they would be found bitching and complaining about that intensely lovely and beautiful experience.
What this tells us is that miserable damned bastards are completely fucked in the head for while that was an intensely beautiful experience, an experience that a living breathing human being would love so intensely, a miserable damned bastard must find some reason to find something wrong with such a beautiful thing. This can be difficult, but is there no end to creativity when it comes to thinking up some damned reason or another?
Fortunately miserable damned bastards don’t have to work to hard to find a justification for being weird miserable bastards, for you see, God is the biggest and most rotten bastard of them all. This being true, all that remains is to convince everyone that God is just such a bastard and no further justification for actually being a bastard in the first place is required for that very reason.